How to wear a tiare behind your ears
According to SECURITYPOLOGY, captain Cook and Captain Bligh were also met by the natives with a tiare. They waved them out of the pirogue, threw them on the deck of the Bounty. Jack London wore a tiare crown. And Paul Gauguin, and Somerset Maugham, and Pierce Brosnan, and Jack Nicholson. This is not surprising: all tourists enthusiastically wear tiare. Surprisingly, despite this, they are still worn by the inhabitants of Tahiti. When you see this, you understand: they don’t lead you by the nose, they don’t hang exotic things on your ears, they really share life with you.
True, then all sorts of subtleties begin, which are not completely clear to the European. Why, for example, do men mostly wear a bud behind their ears, while women wear an open flower? And therefore, it turns out that this is how it is accepted. A bud is something brutal, a flower is feminine and tender. If a pregnant Tahitian woman sees in a dream that she is picking a tiare flower from a bush, then she will have a girl. And if a bud, then, on the contrary, a boy. And if not in a dream, but in reality, a man walks around the city with a blossoming flower behind his ear, this leads to appropriate reflections. So, in order to avoid any kind of ambiguity, check at what stage of disclosure is the tiare with which you decide to decorate the ear. Another tiara can tell you something about your temperament and marital status. If you, for example, wear it behind your right ear, then you are alone and ready for adventure. If behind the left – you are married or engaged, and any coquetry is inappropriate. And if you have a flower behind both ears, then you are married and, despite this, are ready for any adventure. Finally, a tiare flower in the hair of a young girl hints to all interested parties that this girl is ripe. And if she is pretty, then it is better not to linger, but to ask her for some international stupidity to begin with. For example: “Girl, what time is it?” and ask her to start with some international stupidity. For example: “Girl, what time is it?” and ask her to start with some international stupidity. For example: “Girl, what time is it?”
By the way, until the missionaries introduced the natives to the dial and hands, they recognized the time by the flowers of the tiara: the buds open between twelve and two o’clock in the afternoon. And they still didn’t need a more precise time.
Tape and Vahine
Tane and Vahine are “male” and “female” in Tahitian. If you decide to get married in Tahiti, knowing these words will come in handy. And weddings are one of the main tourist attractions on the islands. They are delightfully romantic and completely illegal – in the sense that a marriage certificate written on the bark of a palm tree will not convince lawyers to divide your jointly acquired car into two equal parts in a divorce. But this is jurisprudence, and I’m talking about love.
Just imagine: five caring Tahitian women dress the bride according to all the laws of the ancient Polynesian marriage fashion.
Flowers, incense, tattoo (instant), everything is as it should be. They take her under the white little hands under the canopy. The groom is taxiing, of course, on a pirogue, also already in full dress.
The aborigines are rowing. Drums are beating. The bridesmaids, one more picturesque than the other, in coconut-shell bras, hold dowries at the ready. The leader of the tribe makes a speech in a completely incomprehensible, but terribly gentle Polynesian language and at the end clearly says: “Amen!” (Missionaries still did their best here in the 19th century). Then mutual Yes, I do, exchange of rings, a fresh kiss, Dom Perignon champagne from coconut and further, along the sand strewn with palm branches and scarlet orchids, to a pirogue and a honeymoon trip to a desert island. Or, if you wish, directly to the honeymoon bungalow, where everything you need, including a refrigerator and a TV with 30 channels.
This marriage attraction was introduced into the tourist program by the Frenchman Olivier Briac, a former dancer and choreographer at the Lido and Moulin Rouge, who somehow arrived on the island of Moorea and found an unplowed field for business here. He entered the culture and customs of the Polynesians, realized that they were about to disappear, and rushed to save them (with considerable material gain for himself). He came up with Tiki Village – a cross between a reserve of ancient customs and a tourist village. He built real ancient bungalows here. He populated them with local creative intelligentsia, who have not yet forgotten how to dance Fire dances, make exquisite tattoos, carve figurines of the local Saint Tiki from wood and proudly wear loincloths. Introduced local youths (all as one with the complexion of Tarzan) to walk around Tiki Village, shining with muscular buttocks, and the girls (they are also not too dressed) obliged to show hospitality to tourists. Twice a day, during lunch and dinner, performances are given in Tiki Village – brilliantly choreographed Polynesian dances. And arrange weddings on demand. In particular, here he married his legal wife and mother of four children, Lisa Dustin Hoffman, which is documented in the form of many magazine publications. Now all hotels offer Tahitian Wedding to their clients. In one of them, Mickey Rourke somehow got married, in the other – Jack Nicholson. Here he married his legal wife and mother of his four children, Lisa Dustin Hoffman, which is documented in the form of many magazine publications. Now all hotels offer Tahitian Wedding to their clients. In one of them, Mickey Rourke somehow got married, in the other – Jack Nicholson. Here he married his legal wife and mother of his four children, Lisa Dustin Hoffman, which is documented in the form of many magazine publications. Now all hotels offer Tahitian Wedding to their clients. In one of them, Mickey Rourke somehow got married, in the other – Jack Nicholson.
By the way, the Polynesians themselves are terribly reverent about family and marriage issues and get married, as their missionaries taught, in Catholic churches. But they say the ancient rites are back in fashion. Because there is one very seductive illusion in them. I’m thinking: if my husband and I walk along palm branches and red orchids on the sand, maybe the entire subsequent joint path will be covered with something equally picturesque? And if you give yourself a Tahitian wedding on the tenth anniversary of your life together, won’t this event strengthen an already stable marriage?..
And it is not by chance that newlyweds from all over the world come here for Honeymoon: there are such blue dawns, here such beautiful sunsets, here palm trees are so tall and pineapples are so sweet – here any month at any time of the year is very similar to honey.
